The ultimate wedding/funeral mascaras

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it, but I have remarkably watery eyes. Yawning, laughing, coughing, breezes; they all make my damned eyes water.

This sucks for a lot of reasons, not least among them is wearing mascara. You know I love mascara, and as I’ve gotten older and worn more makeup I’ve learned to mitigate this problem, but it’s something I have to keep in mind every time I think about trying a new mascara. It’s especially something to think about when I’m going to an event where I know I’ll be crying, like a wedding or a funeral, and I’ve had a lot of mascara disasters in these situations, so I thought I’d share my top picks and a couple you should definitely avoid.


bareMinerals Flawless Definition Waterproof Mascara

This is my top choice. I’ve worn this through several funerals, a wedding I was part of, and a Disney vacation in May when it was 90 degrees with 95% humidity. This mascara never smudged, ran, flaked or gave up in any way. It also didn’t irritate my eyes like so many do. Not that I have sensitive eyes really, but there are some mascaras that just make them itchy or I can feel it on my lashes and I don’t like it. This isn’t one of them. It’s also relatively inexpensive; it’s high end for $19 when so many others are running into the mid-$20 range.

CoverGirl Clump Crusher

I’m not a huge fan of this mascara in general; it doesn’t do anything for my lashes, the formula is a little too wet and it’s a little too heavy. I really don’t like feeling mascara on my lashes. However, once it’s on my lashes it doesn’t go anywhere. If you don’t have sensitive eyes it might be for you.

L’Oreal Voluminous Lash Paradise Waterproof Mascara

I included this in my post about my favorite mascaras under $10 a few months ago, and it remains a favorite. I love just about everything about this mascara; it’s good to go right out of the tube, it doesn’t annoy my eyes and when I cry hysterically it doesn’t run down my face.

A waterproof topcoat

A few brands have these now and they’re a good idea; you can use it with any mascara so it’s totally flexible. I used the one from Ulta before they changed the formula and it wasn’t great, but the updated one does exactly what I wanted it to do. NYX also makes one, though I haven’t tried it. If this is something that appeals to you, check them both out.


Any Physician’s Formula Mascara

I’ve tried a handful of mascaras from this brand and every single one has been terrible. I’ve tried the organic and argan oil and some of the others, and every one has ended up making my eyes feel like fire. Then they start to water, and three minutes later there are huge black streaks running down my face. It’s not awesome.

Too Faced Better Than Sex Waterproof Mascara

I don’t like this brand. I don’t like the original formula. I don’t like the waterproof version. It flakes all over my face, transfers to my lower lashline and is practically impossible to get off, which makes absolutely no sense. Also, it’s $23. That is too much money for a mascara, especially one that isn’t awesome.

Maybelline Great Lash Waterproof Mascara

I know this is a throwback mascara, but I hate it. There isn’t a single redeeming quality about this mascara. It goes everywhere, irritates my eyes, and the packaging is so ugly. I know that doesn’t impact the functionality of the mascara but it makes me less inclined to use it.

What are your favorites? Do you have any recommendations? I’ve got wedding coming so I welcome suggestions!

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